You Are Not Limitless (and that's okay)

Hey everyone,

I hope you’ve all been well. This will be the last newsletter I write before I head off to Italy with my family for a couple weeks. I’m hoping to come back with a broader perspective, and new insights (I should probably just try to enjoy myself, too.)

The “Limitless” Mindset

Self improvement is full of people telling you that you can do absolutely anything.

Your potential is endless.

But how far can you really stretch that?

I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been feeling like I can do anything recently.

Between the consistent amount of quality sleep, the lack of takeout food, and my newfound spark for writing/reading more often, I haven’t felt this sharp and energized in a long time.

I made it a mission at the start of this year to start running at least once per week, and so far, I’ve been sticking to that really well over the past few months.

So I thought to myself, “since it’s been going so well, why don’t we up the ante a little bit?”

I started to increase the frequency with which I was running by adding it at the end of some of my weightlifting workouts.

But after couple weeks passed by, I suddenly started to feel slightly overtrained.

The knee pain I’ve been dealing with on and off for 3 years now was coming back with more intensity, and I was a bit more lethargic even when I was getting 8 hours of sleep.

But I didn’t want to listen. After all, if David Goggins can run 100 miles in a day and be fine, why can’t I run only a couple miles a week?

I pushed myself past my physical limits, straining my muscles and knees tirelessly.

Then, after several more weeks, I woke up with my knees feeling the worst they had since I started trying to improve them the past year.

This is when I started to realize that my intentional suffering was actually starting to negatively affect both my weightlifting, and my mile time.

I wish I could say with confidence that you can do absolutely anything.

That no matter what limits your body or mind has imposed on you, you can smash through them with ease.

And you might think that me saying you can’t, directly opposes the advice I frequently give about being delusionally optimistic.

But there’s a difference between being delusionally optimistic about your goals and what you think you can achieve, and consistently breaking past your limits to the point where your progress becomes hindered.

Everyone should try to push past their limits, and see what they’re truly capable of.

But one should do so while weighing the risk of exceeding those limits too far, and too often.

If, every time you crush past your limits, you can feel yourself garnering more strength, and the surpassing of your limit sets a new, better standard for your next highest limit, then yes, the limit is probably worth continuing to surpass.

For example, if you have bad social anxiety, and you talk to one more stranger than you usually do per day, that might be past the limits of what you thought you were capable of.

And at this point in your journey towards becoming more socially confident, reaching beyond your current limits provides nothing but benefits.

But there’s a point in your limit-breaking journey (at least, with most things) where going beyond your limits any further will start to do more harm than good.

Continuing on the last example, maybe you get up to talking to 20 random strangers a day.

But you find that once you get to the 20th person, you’re starting to neglect your own mental health so much, to the point where you feel completely drained and can’t talk to anyone for two days afterwards.

It takes a lot of self awareness to realize that that point exists.

And yes, you could keep pushing past that limit, but… should you?

You have to have the humility to know that going beyond that point (at least, for right now) will do more damage than development.

Something I like to tell myself is, “I can do anything, but I can’t do everything.”

And what I mean by that is, I could, theoretically, do almost anything I put my mind to.

But I know I can’t do everything in that anything, because I have my limits as a human.

So yes, please test your limits to see where that “upper limit” lies.

Doing so is imperative to improving your self awareness.

But once you reach the limit in that test where the destruction outweighs the progression, then consistently work at the upper end of that limit, but rarely, if ever, try passing it.

Developing The Humility And Self Awareness

One of the most advantageous skills you can develop, is an ability to see when you are actually doing more harm than good to yourself, by actively listening to your body and mind.

I attribute the development of that ability to every single successful relationship, life, or business pursuit I’ve ever had.

But if you don’t even know where or how that begins, then you’ll never get to the point where you feel like trying to surpass your limits is useful.

Many of you are currently stuck in a state of self-sabotage.

Of binge watching self help YouTube videos, and thinking to yourself, "Okay, this is finally the day everything changes."

The motivation to take action is strong, and you feel yourself developing into a newer, more self-aware identity.

But after a while, that motivation wears off, and you're back to where you always started.

Why does this happen?

It happens because:

1. You are unable to accept yourself as you are right now.

2. You don't have access to the most in depth information that is specifically tailored to you (and not a social media audience.)

3. The only person that is trying to hold you accountable is yourself (and that will almost always fail.)

If you want to truly master yourself for good, and you want to join a community of like minded individuals all looking to improve, you should check out my Ultimate Self Mastery Course.

The course features 14 videos with 15+ worksheets, a guided meditation, and an exclusive community where we all hold each other accountable and give further advice.

This course is a culmination of years of research on behavioral science, psychology, and of course, trial and error from my own life.

Being able to actually apply the advice you receive, and get consistent feedback from like-minded people are probably the two most important factors in seeing permanent change.

And I’m guessing you currently feel like you can’t talk to anyone in real life about your struggles with self development, right?

That’s why our community meets in a group coaching call every other week to make sure we are all staying on the path towards self mastery.

Here's a picture from one of our recent calls:

So If you're ready to join our community and see lasting change, you can check out all the details by clicking here.

Watch the intro video on that page to see if the course is right for you.

Hope to see you in the community.

Quote of The Week

Thanks for reading, everyone. Hope you enjoy your weekend.

-Cole