Your Labels Are Ruining Your Life

The Labeling Outbreak

The modern world loves to separate us in the form of labels.

Practically every experience, trauma, negative/positive emotion, interest, or symptom now has a corresponding label.

And while this has no doubt been incredible for our ability to solve problems—since labeling a problem makes it much easier to diagnose it, and offer solutions—there’s a less talked about consequence of this labeling.

In fact, it could be the very thing that is limiting your ability to improve.

The Exercise

Think of how many times you’ve been scrolling through social media and you noticed a title that caught your eye.

“Do you like to do (thing) a lot?”

“Do you often feel like (emotion)?”

“Then you might be (label).”

Has this ever psyched you out before?

Well, here’s the thing: the diagnoses might often be right. And like I said, if they are, then it becomes much easier to find solutions if the label is causing damage.

But with each new label you pin to yourself, you are adding extra weight to carry around. And that weight constrains you.

As soon as you say, “Well, I can’t do that because I’m (label)”, you are immediately limiting what you think you are capable of.

And, at the same time, you are ostracizing (and potentially disagreeing with) anyone who doesn’t fit that label.

For example, I used to constantly label myself as, “The guy who couldn’t finish anything”.

Any personal project I tried to do outside of school, or even schoolwork itself, was always finished to 80-90% completion.

It subtly spilled itself into other areas of my life so much, that every time I would sit down to eat a meal, I’d leave one or two bites on the plate without consciously realizing it.

It limited me. If I was the guy who couldn’t finish anything, how could I ever expect to get anything meaningful done?

It was only until I really started doing the inner work that I’m about to give to you, that I started to transform the labels that made up “me”.

So here’s what I want you to do:

• Write down every label you can think of that defines you. They could be your personality traits, your interests, what you think most of the time…just write down every characteristic or diagnosis that you think makes up “you”. This will give you a clear picture of how you view your identity.

• Then, think about how some of those labels might be holding you back. What do these labels allow you to NOT do, or pursue? Who do you think is “wrong” because they don’t conform to your labels?

• Next, think about what behaviors or experiences reinforced those labels. What evidence do you have to prove that those labels are true?

• And lastly, I want you to think/write about what life would look like without that label. How much more capable do you think you would be? How much more do you think you could achieve? How much freedom would you now have?

Again, labels and constraints can actually be beneficial.

By calling myself a “YouTuber”, which is a positive label, my mind defaults to disregarding almost anything that doesn’t help me get to that label.

And usually, that’s useful.

But if you analyze your labels, and you find that they are doing you more harm than good, it’s time to start writing a new story about yourself.

And the only way to start really believing those new labels, and that new story, is through action.

Rewriting Your Story

What you are doing in this very moment—and every moment in the future—will define the story of the life you are writing.

And if you aren’t currently happy with that story, or you don’t think you deserve a better one, take it from me—someone who had zero confidence and disliked himself for most of his life:

You can absolutely change that story at any time.

It might take years of deliberate action, mindset shifts, and the right influences, but you can create an identity that will make you wake up everyday and be truly proud of yourself.

I wished that there was a resource to help people understand what they’re actually capable of (which is always WAY more than what they think), and teach them the methods that I’ve used over the years to become the most financially, mentally, and physically fulfilled I’ve ever been.

And that is why I created my Ultimate Self Mastery School.

The Ultimate Self Mastery School is a place for those who want to actualize their greatest potential, strengthen their self awareness, build better habits, and develop a fulfilling life.

The school features 14 videos with 15+ worksheets, a guided meditation, and an exclusive community where we all hold each other accountable and give further advice.

This course is a culmination of years of research on behavioral science, psychology, and of course, trial and error from my own life.

And we meet in a group coaching call every other week to make sure we never stray from the path of self mastery.

It’s been an incredible way for everyone to open up about things that they have been going through, and get feedback and advice without judgement.

And because of that, the friendships in there feel genuine.

Here's some recent wins from our community:

Hope to see you in the community.

Quote of The Week

Thanks for reading, everyone. Hope you enjoy your weekend.

-Cole